Tiré du Women's Health de mai 2009, page 84 :
Love wisdom that still applies
These adages have stuck over time for good reason: they actually work.
1) Don't live together before you're married.
Research shows that if you shack up, your man will be less likely to pop the question and that your sex life will be less satisfying. "Make sure you're engaged or have a serious commitment before you take that huge step," says Robi Ludwig, Psy.D., a New York City-based psychotherapist.
2) The grass always looks greener on the other side.
"A lot of people fail to realise they have perfectly good relationships, because they get caught up in comparing themselves with other couples," says Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., chief relationship expert at Perfectmatch.com. In reality, everyone has problems - some pairs just hide theirs better.
3) Don't sleep with him on the first date.
"Having sex too soon puts all kinds of emotional pressure on you both," says Women's Health sex advisor Yvonne Fulbright, Ph.D. And like it or not, a double standard still exists - some guys think a woman they can bed on the first date isn't girlfriend material. Bottom line: if a guy is really into you, he'll wait.
4) The sex gets better over time.
"As couples get to know each other's bodies, there's a reliability in sexual response," says Fulbright. And, she adds, reliable doesn't have to mean boring. Familiarity can anso breed a deeper intimacy and greater willingness to explore new territory together - two things that are sure to keep you both extremely satisfied for years to come.
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Dans l'autre partie de l'article, il y a de ces règles qui ne s'appliquent pas. Voici un résumé:
Conventional wisdom : Don't have sex if you're not in the mood
New rule : Getting busy (donc faire l'amour :P) gets you in the mood
Et en plus? 30 min de batifolages font perdre 200 calories :P
Conventional wisdom : You need to say "I love you" to each other every day
New rule : Verbalizing feelings should be more than just a habit
À la longue, l'importance de ces mots perd de son sens. Il vaut mieux le dire quand on le ressent vraiment, et encore mieux, d'une manière nouvelle et intéressante. Par exemple, en faisant un compliment : "Tu es vraiment le meilleur époux du monde". Ou encore en utilisant des petits surnoms. Ou bien en disant son appréciation : "C'était vraiment attentionné de ta part de faire le plein de la voiture". (c'est pas moi qui sort les exemples :P)
Conventional wisdom : You should never fake an orgasm
New rule : It's ok to pull off an academy award-winning performance every once in a while.
Et là je vais carrément copier-coller ce qui est écrit dans l'article car c'est plus clair :
Those in sexually gratifying relationships are perfectly entitled to fake it from time to time. "Women usually fake an orgasm because they're tired and want to go to bed, and that's fine, on occasion," says Fulbright. It's also a convenient way to please your partner without getting into a potentially complicated and ego-bruising conversation about how, thgouth you're thoroughly enjoying the eride, there's no way you're going to make it to O-Town tonight.
"But if you don't have orgasms on a regular basis, never fake it," Fulbright says. You'll only encourage him to keep doing whatever he's doing that isn't working. Instead, show him how to get you off - guide his hand to your hot spots during sex or initiate a position you know is a sure thing for you.
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